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    2021年考研英語：寫作高分范文點評
    52. Directions:
    Write an essay of 160-200 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should
    1) describe the drawing briefly,
    2) explain its intended meaning, and then
    3) support your view with an example/examples.
    You should write neatly on ANSWER SHEET 2. (20 points)
    一、推薦范文
    This cartoon humorously presents a scene of a football game with the two rivals facing each other. The striker on one team is preparing to make a decisive shoot while the goal-keeper on the opposite team is posing for defense. However, under overwhelming pressure, both of them are losing their confidence. The striker magnifies the goal-keeper in his mind so that chances of shooting in are slim. Likewise, the goal-keeper minimizes his own image as if he couldn’t defend the goal successfully.
    Apparently, the purpose of the picture is to emphasize the importance of self-confidence in our daily life. On account of the quickening pace of life, competition goes increasingly fierce in all walks of life, imposing tremendous pressure on all individuals. The past few years have witnessed dramatic increase in the difficulty of examinations and employment. We must maintain powerful self-confidence and optimism in the face of challenges so as to survive and succeed. Suppose we are inclined to overestimate our rivals or problems and neglect our ability, we will become hesitating and doubtful of ourselves, unable to fulfill even a simple task. Therefore, it is necessary to embrace the strong faith that we are indomitable and invincible.
    A case in point is the world famous star hurdler, Liu Xiang. He invariably imagines positively that he can win in every hurdle race, never shrinking in front of other experienced players. That's why he works wonders again and again. As for me, I am participating in the college admission examination for graduates with thousands of competitors. Having prepared sufficiently for one year, I have powerful self-assurance that I can cruise to my dream university. As the saying goes, our only enemy is ourselves. Only by building strong self-confidence can we show grace under pressure and turn our dreams into reality.
    二、內(nèi)容分析
    一篇合格的應(yīng)試類英語作文，首要的是內(nèi)容上滿足題目中給出的所有要點，這也是各個分?jǐn)?shù)等級的評分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)中第一個考察點。試題題目中明確給出了提綱式的內(nèi)容要點，考生只要稍加注意，找到要點，并將每個要點寫清楚，文章的基本分?jǐn)?shù)就拿到了，更不至于跑題。此篇范文對圖畫部分描述得詳盡到位，意義闡釋部分把自信的重要性通過正面和反面分別進行了論證，舉例部分提到了劉翔和考研學(xué)生的自信，從而正面強調(diào)了自信在競爭中的巨大作用。所以，內(nèi)容分析得齊全是其成功之處。
    三、結(jié)構(gòu)分析
    從結(jié)構(gòu)上看，第一段先是描述圖畫信息，先說明是場足球比賽，之后進入射門球員和守門員的細(xì)節(jié)描述。第二段從足球賽引申到現(xiàn)實生活中，生活節(jié)奏加快、競爭加劇、考試殘酷就業(yè)艱難，種種挑戰(zhàn)都需要我們樹立自信心。最后一段，舉例論證，劉翔因自信而百戰(zhàn)百勝，創(chuàng)造了世界紀(jì)錄?？佳袑W(xué)生只有自信，才能夢想成真，考入理想學(xué)校。此篇范文的結(jié)構(gòu)清晰，邏輯通順合理。
    四、語句分析
    1、特色詞語表達(dá)
    射門球員(striker)、射門(shoot)、守門員(goal-keeper)、對方球隊(opposite team)、防守姿態(tài)(pose for defense)、球門(goal)、守門(defend the goal)、百折不撓(indomitable)、不可戰(zhàn)勝(invincible)、總是(invariably)等。
    2、用詞廣度拓展
    在強調(diào)“自信”主題時，先后分別使用了self-confidence、embrace strong faith、self-assurance等表達(dá);修飾壓力或自信的詞語，分別使用了形容詞overwhelming、tremendous、dramatic、strong、powerful;“競爭者”則用 rivals和 competitors。廣度擴展出來的詞語在不同段落中點綴，加強了語言的亮度。
    3、名言名句使用
    諺語和名言往往能夠起到畫龍點睛的作用，在文章結(jié)尾，首先借用了一句諺語來烘托主題 As the saying goes, our only enemy is ourselves，最后提到了著名強者作家海明威的名言——show grace under pressure，成功總結(jié)了自信帶來的巨大作用。